My first scan isn’t for another two weeks, so it still doesn’t feel real that I’m actually pregnant yet. Of course I know that I am, but sometimes I still doubt that it’s real. Perhaps I entered menopause early and that’s why I don’t have my period (but then why would both the pregnancy tests I took be positive?) Ahh it messes with your head.

It still seems to be going so slowly. I’m only 2 months pregnant. I can’t even tell people yet. It seems like forever until I can tell my friends. Of course both my mum and my partner’s parents know – they were told straight away, but we are keeping hush to everyone else.

I’m craving lots of yummy healthy food. Yesterday we had a BBQ for Father’s Day and all I wanted was fruit salad. After steak and a lovely garden salad with delicious olive oil/balsamic vinegar dressing I made a huge bowl of fruit salad that had strawberries, banana’s, rockmelon, blueberries, kiwi fruit, passionfruit, and grapes in it. I was in heaven. It tasted sublime.

God I’m drooling again just thinking about it. I’ll have to buy some more berries and make it up again.

I can’t remember what size my bub is meant to be this week. An olive? Something like that. That’s of course if there is only one in there. I keep thinking I’m having two. I don’t know why I think that. I’m probably wrong of course – but everywhere I go I keep hearing ‘twins this, twins that’. hmmm.

I’m certainly not showing for twins so there probably is really only one in there. I guess I won’t find out for another two weeks yet.

And to make matters worse my partner is going away then for work. I’ll have to go to the scan by myself and take my 3 year old with me. That’s going to be hassle for sure.

I’m not really looking forward to him being away for a whole week. I’m already exhausted as it is. If he isn’t there to take over when he gets home from work (while I collapse on the bed) then I don’t think my 3 year old will ever go to bed.

It sometimes seems if time is going so slowly and I’m so early into the pregnancy that nothing seems to be happening at all, and other times it seems if time is going by in a blur and all of a sudden it’s next week and I’m another week pregnant.

According to the books, this week my baby is the size of a tic-tac or a small kidney bean. Not that it means much at this stage. I don’t even think it has hands or feet yet – just little buds. Seems surreal that something that small and blobbish can turn into a real life thinking feeling human being. Life sure is a miracle.

Well this week I seemed to go to bed skinny and wake up fat. Already I’m looking all bloated and pregnant. Of course I can’t be showing yet, the bub is the size of a pencil head so it must be hormonal – or maybe there is more than one in there – yikes! Won’t be able to find that out for a few more weeks when I have my first scan at 10 1/2 weeks pregnant.

I also got quite a bad cold this week and was really worried about what I could and couldn’t take. I had the worst cold and cough. The cough was bad enough to keep me sleepless for about three nights in a row. That can’t be good for the baby. Fortunately it seems to be going now, but it’s taken over a week to start feeling better.

In the end I went to the pharmacy and she recommended a cough mixture that was safe to take while pregnant. It didn’t do much for my cough though – I’m guessing it was pretty mild, but at least it made me feel like I was doing something about it.

I’m still really tired and when I can, I try to have a nap in the afternoon. Although that’s only possible if my 3 year old decides to take a nap – and that isn’t very often these days. Weekends are much better when DH is home.

Other than that, I don’t feel like there is much else I can do at the moment. I guess I should try and enjoy the moment. Ahh isn’t waiting fun.